(Prior to his death, typical of Fritz, he determined to write his own obituary. Here it is.)
Well what do you know? For many years now, every morning I’ve checked the obituary notices to see if my name was there and today, there it is. So here goes.
I was born in 1933 in Cologne, Germany to my Jewish father (Fritz Behr) and my Christian mother (Rose Witteman Behr), a few days after Adolph Hitler came to power in Germany (not the best timing, Fritz). My father was forced to flee to the United States in 1939. He managed to bring my mother, my brother Kurt and me to the U.S. in April of 1941 (thank God before the U.S. got into WWII). Several of my close Jewish relatives perished in Nazi concentration camps. My younger brother, Richard was born in the U.S. in 1942. Both of my brothers have predeceased me.
I grew up in Astoria, Long Island, New York and later on my family and I lived in Hicksville, Long Island, New York. I worked for a time as a paper cutter and book binder before joining the New York City Police Dept. in 1956. I rose through the ranks of that Department as a Police Officer, Detective, Sergeant, Lieutenant, Captain and Deputy Inspector. While a member of the New York Police Department, I graduated with a Bachelor of Police Science degree from John Jay College (City University of New York) and was awarded a full four year scholarship to St. John’s University School of Law (then located in Brooklyn, New York) , graduating in 1971 with the degree of Juris Doctor (cum laude). I passed the bar exam and was admitted to the practice of law in the courts of New York State. Shortly thereafter, I was chosen by the New York City Police Department to attend the ten week course at the FBI National Academy (Quantico, VA). I was also a Sergeant E-6 in the 42nd Infantry Regiment of the New York National Guard
In 1976 (to the day exactly 25 years prior to the 9/11/2001 World Trade Towers incident), I was injured by a bomb left by Croatian terrorists who had hijacked a plane from New York. The explosion killed one of my friends (a fellow police officer) and seriously injured two of our other NYCPD co-workers. I helped to carry my injured friends to an ambulance before being forced to go to the hospital myself. As a result of my injuries, I retired on disability from the NYPD in March, 1977. In June of that year all four of us were awarded the NYCPD Medal of Honor – the Department’s highest award. (The God of my understanding has a terrific sense of humor – now I had the big medal but no longer had a uniform on which to pin it.) In August of 1977, all four of us were also awarded the Federal Aviation Administration Distinguished Service Award by the U.S. Department of Transportation for dealing with that same act of political terrorism.
In July of 1977, I began work for Montana Attorney General Mike Greely as the Administrator of the Law Enforcement Services Division in the Montana Department of Justice. I served in that position until Mr. Greely left office in January, 1989. At that time, I went to work for Montana Governor Stan Stephens as his Executive Administrative Assistant and personal security officer until he left office at the beginning of 1993. At that time I then retired from State government.
I thoroughly enjoyed my 36 year career in law enforcement. In addition, I had great fun in my active retirement years – downhill skiing, hiking, traveling, staying in shape at local gyms, and lots of volunteer work at St. Paul’s United Methodist Church and on “Litter Patrol.” I had lots of fun and joy in my life and I thank my wonderful wife, Angela, and my many friends for having made that possible.
For many, many years, I greatly enjoyed and looked forward to leading adult Bible study groups. My basic approach to this type of study was a common sense, historical, sociological one and definitely not a literal, factual or inerrant acceptance of the Bible. My beliefs were based on what I had learned from the exercise of my own reason, as validated by the writings and teachings of Hans Kung, Marcus Borg, John Shelby Spong, John Dominic Crossan and others. In my classes, I emphasized the importance of our common Judeo-Christian heritage and faith. I loved St. Paul’s United Methodist Church because, in accord with its adherence to its Open Hearts/Open Minds/Open Doors policy, it allowed me to be myself and encouraged me in my conducting of those classes.
The best thing that ever happened to me in my entire life is that on September 21, 1958 Angela Borace became my wife. She was the love of my life. We were married 54 years and she has been THE greatest blessing of my life. That’s why I have so often referred to her as SAINT ANGELA for putting up with me all those years. We had three children – our daughter Lorraine and our sons, Frank and Fred. (Fred has predeceased me).
Survivors include my beloved wife, Angela (Helena, MT); my daughter, Lorraine Behr-Formaz and son-in-law, Pete Formaz (Helena, MT) and sole grandchild, Lauren Angela Formaz (Los Angeles, CA); and my son, Frank Behr and his wife, Kathaleen (of Surprise, Az.) I am very proud of all six of them.
Another truly wonderful thing that has happened to me is that, by the grace of God as I understand God, I have been a continuously sober member of Alcoholics Anonymous since October 10, 1984 (a total of 28 years, which adds up to more than 10,290 days of sobriety) at the time of my death. For those many years, AA has given me a great opportunity to TRY to be of service to others. That’s why for some time now my personalized Montana license plates have read “AA IOU” and “AA OK”, which, I hope and believe, has not violated A.A.’s anonymity traditions.
IF:
By my professional, financial, emotional and spiritual efforts I have been able to improve the lives of my immediate family; and if-
By my law enforcement work I have been able to make society a little safer; and if-
By my (admittedly) sometimes corny jokes and stories I have brightened someone’s day; and if –
By the junk I have picked up and the recycling I have done with my “Litter Patrol” truck I have managed in some small measure to contribute to a cleaner environment in the Greater Helena area; and if-
By my gifts to charitable organizations I have been able in some small way to alleviate human suffering; and if-
By my Bible study classes and discussions I have helped a few people (by using their God-given intelligence) to improve their conscious contact with a Higher Power of their own understanding; and if-
By my 12th step work in the Alcoholics Anonymous program I have helped even a few of my fellow alcoholics to achieve and maintain continuing sobriety; –
Then I consider my life to have been worthwhile and a success. I enjoyed it. It was a “blast”!
“Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps”(the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous) I have “tried to carry this message to other alcoholics and to practice these principles in all my affairs”.
Cremation has taken place. A celebration of Fritz’s life will be held at 11:00 am Friday, December 21, 2012 at St. Paul’s United Methodist Church with a reception to immediately follow in the social hall of the church. Inurnment will take place at a later date in the columbarium niche at Sunset Memorial Gardens cemetery. In lieu of flowers, it is requested that anyone choosing to do so, please make a donation to St. Paul’s United Methodist Church Building Fund, 512 Logan, Helena, Montana 59601, Helena Food Share, P.O Box 943, Helena, Montana 59624, Hospice of St. Peter’s, 2475 Broadway, Helena, Montana or other charity of their choice. Please visit www.aswfuneralhome.com to offer the family condolences or share a memory of Fritz.
P.S. I have received the most wonderful care I could ever have hoped for from my primary care giver, Dr. Don Skillman, MD and from my oncologist, Dr. Justin Thomas, MD. Most of all, thanks and blessings to the marvelous Hospice program of St. Peter’s Hospital and its super-dedicated staff.
John L. says
Hello, my name is John, and I am an alcoholic.
Fritz, your wisdom and guidance saved my life. Your example of the 12 steps in action were my inspiration. Rest in peace.
Jim and Angela Spall says
Fritz was a good and devoted public servant, a wonderful friend and a marvelous communicator. We both learned much from him and enjoyed his friendship these past 30 plus years. May you rest in peace, dear friend. Thank you for all you did for us.
Angela and Jim Spall
Dianne says
I am blessed to have walked this path with you for over 26 years. I will always remember you for Step 0 “if you have decided you want what we have…”; and it’s “of the road to happy destiny” not “to the road!” you’d say, and your dedicated commitment to the proper use of pronouns. And for Fritz’s method of problem solving: 1. Is it really a problem or do I just think it’s a problem? 2. If it’s a problem, who’s problem is it? 3. If it’s my problem I need to address it. 4. If it’s not my problem I need to let it go; and for “suggested program of recovery” Fritz says “if you jump out of a plane, we suggest you pull your ripcord, you don’t have to, but we suggest it… You were a reader at my wedding. We walked through losing Freddie and my brother 2 mos. apart. You’ve been there for me every step of the way. You were like a father to me and I will miss you so. Until we meet again, on the road OF happy destiny, love you, Fritz.
Cathy and Randy Feliz says
Fritz, you have been with me my whole sobriety. I remember going to the Saturday night meetings at Plymouth Cong. and the St. Mary’s nooners. You have always been willing to help, you sponsored my husband, you have added to our wonderful life. Thank you, Angela, Lorraine and Pete for everything. God blessed us with you.
Jeannette Garay Manning says
Someday through my tears I will be able to form the words to convey how blessed, lucky & honored I was/am to be loved by you. Welcome to your reward you good & faithful servant. Saint Angela you are the example I desire to be. Pete, Lorraine & Lauren & Frank-thank you for sharing him with us. And I weep…
Lana L. Cooper says
Fritz, it was a joy to visit with you on November 29, 2012. You were cheerful and upbeat, and I loved your jokes! You are someone that I will remember forever. Rosemary and I were with you and Angela when Fred passed away, and you both were so strong, and that is how I remember you-strong. God has a new angel in heaven and his name is Fritz. I will see you again Fritz!
Larry & Anne Bauer says
Angela, Lorraine, and Fred,
I’ll never forget talking to Fritz and his fearlessness before he died, never forget his commitment to what he called the God of his understanding, and never forget how bowled over he was with the love he felt for you. Whether I saw him at St. Paul’s or the Y or out picking up litter, he always had a smile on his face and time to say hello. We, and so many others, will miss him. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Ryan says
Thank you Fritz for the all the wisdom and experience you shared with me. I could never thank you enough for all you did.
Linnea G. says
My fondest memory of Fritz was the cross country skiing class we took together. He was the one person in that quiet, determined class of adults who consistently came screaming down the hill, crashing at the bottom in a snowy heap. His craziness made everyone much more relaxed, especially those of us who just arrived in Helena from Chicago and other big cities across the country. It was a great time to relocate, and Fritz made it extra special with his love of life, his positive attitude, and his joy in everything he did. God bless you, Fritz, forever.
Stephanie S. says
Ah Fritz and those shorts and governor’s cup shirts. One always listened closely when he spoke. I’ll miss seeing you in the current pool at CCHC, Fritz. You added so much to my sobriety. Thank you.
Ralph Guay says
Thanks Fritz.
Bobbie Zenker says
I was just about four months sober when I met Fritz. He was leading the AA meeting at my first Pride celebration in 2006. It was my first day “out” as a woman and I was scared. Yet, I was immediately calmed by Fritz’s gentle humor, kindness and affirmation. I knew who to call two months later when I moved to Helena. He took me to my first meeting in Helena (FFL) which remains my home group today. I will always remember Fritz saying in that New York accent that a spiritual awakening is “a profound alteration in our reaction to life.” I have not forgotten the lesson either. Thanks Fritz
Mark Richford says
A houi hou
Kirk says
Thank you Fritz for your friendship, your hospitality and the fun we had together.
Sharon Stevenson says
From Grand Street Theatre in the early 1980’s to Bridger Bowl the last several years, what a treat to spend some time with Fritz. I am sad he is gone. My thoughts and prayers are with you, Angela and family, and my expression of appreciation for all the special times shared. Love, Sharon
Jane says
I didn’t know you, Mr. Behr, but I wish I had.
Mike and Dorothy McCarter says
To Angela, Lorraine, Pete, Loren, Frank,
We have know you all since 1977. Fritz added so much vitality, spark, and good humor to the community. We will miss him very much. Please accept our deepest sympathies, and keep in touch. We are there for you.
Boomer says
Fritz ,even wanted to make sure the last report on him was correct, — that nobody got it wrong!!! He had always inspired me with his hard charging walking at the YMCA a long time ago. When I wanted to take it easy the image of his effort would spur me on. I will miss his humor and you could always tell he was from The East
Wilmot, Maddie, Jaymie & Bliss Collins says
Angela, Lorraine, Pete and Fred:
I first met Fritz 1997 at AYA in Boulder, MT., he provided legal training to the staff, he was very inspiring and when I met him several years later at Morning Light I reminded him about his training and we hit it off right there, and had coffee alot at Morning Light and most recently at the capital city health club. This community will miss you. To the family take comfort in knowing that your husband, dad, grandfather, father in-law touched many lives and he’s only answering his father’s call. Our deepest sympathy to all of you.
Bob Musselman says
Fritz,
Your visit to my bedside at St. Pete’s in 1998, changed my attitude and outlook on life forever. It also saved my life. For that I’m forever grateful and obliged to pass it on when the opportunity presents itself.
Peace my friend.
Duey Honka. says
Thank you Fritz for your friendship the 32 years i have known you.
And giving me the desire to live one day at a time.
Jody Button Calvao says
I was saddened to hear of the passing of such a great man. I had the pleasure of meeting Mr. Behr when I attended college at U of M with his daughter Lorraine. My thoughts and prayers go out to the Behr family. Peace to you all.
Russell J Trasky says
Sincere condolences to Saint Angela and family. Thank you Fritz for the mindful lesson of love, courage, and grace at the most important time of life.
Jody Button Calvao says
I was saddened to hear of the passing of such a great man. I had the pleasure of meeting Mr. and Mrs. Behr while I attended college in Missoula (U of M) in the late seventies with Lorraine. When ever they went to Missoula to visit Lorraine, they always invited me to their outings and dinner. He always made us laugh and I so enjoyed the times I spent with the Behr family. My deepest condolences to all of you and may peace be with you at this difficult time. Always your friend Jody Button Calvao
MAUREEN GLANZ says
MY HEARTFELT SYMPATHY TO ANGELA AND FAMILY DURING THIS SAD TIME. ALL OF YOU ARE IN MY THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS KNOWING OUR LOVING LORD WILL COMFORT YOU WITH HIS EVERLASTING LOVE EACH NEW DAY.
Bob Kosheff says
Your friendship of 45 years was one of the great blessings of my life. Thank you Fritzo.
John A. Burke says
I miss Fritz’s friendship and guidance. A part of my life left with him, I will always remember him in my thoughts and prayers. Like so many others he helped me through some rough spots in my life. We also had many wonderful times together. May his soul rest in peace and his family find solace in the good works and memories he left for all of us.
terence o'toole says
I never met Fritz, I came upon his name in the funeral announcements of the NYPD. I remember the incident which caused his disability. As an executive member of the NYPD, I am proud of his lifetime accomplishments. God bless Fritz and his loving family. Fidelis Ad Mortem.
Franz Pfadt says
We pray for you in Leimersheim, Germany. Rest in Peace.
Warrant Officer, Douglas Strykier-Lovfall, U.S. Marine Corps (T.D.R.L.-Stadus) says
Well Done, YES YOU Made It!, “FRITZ”, Into The Kingdom Of Heaven, You Inspired My Fiancée, Lana LaRae Cooper-Elbert, & Got Me!!, Inspired, In God Almighties, 12 Step Program. Now Helena, Has “The Sober Project” By God’s Holy Spirit, Many Angelic Power’s, have Directed The LPost Sole’s in The Original 12 Steps Programs Around Helena, Are Lost in there Ways Of Salvation!, Till Christ Took Back Control Of Our Capital & As Christ Has Directed “Us to Go Out With (THE SOBER PROJECT’s 12 Steps!!!,) & Have His Spirit Use US!, All Saved Spiritual Men & Women, To Make Carasmatic Desiple’s Out Of All Men!!, Thanks Fritz, You Made It & Praise God, Yours
Steve Borace says
Fritz;
I was browsing the net and came across your self written obit. It brought back so many memories and I realized that I didn’t lose a brother-in-law when you passed, I lost my BROTHER.
I will miss you the rest of my life.
Rest in Peace
Steve
Paco Dennison says
Fritz was my friend 😊 and sponsor for 20 years. Glad to report that I have been clean and sober for 12 yrs thanks to Fritz. He changed my life in such a positive impact on me by his example of living the 12 steps that I finally realize how much giving back means. That my contact of my HP is amazing 😊 and important at all times. So thank you so much Fritz Behr and your family for putting up with me over the years. By loving me when I didn’t love myself by never giving up on me
Rest in peace my friend 😊. I love you and your family