Melanie was sunshine.
To know her was to be loved by her. She was the first to hug, the last to let go. The first to compliment, the first to dance, the first to roll up her sleeves and say, “Everything is washable.” She did not do anything halfway, she was all in. She mothered with her entire soul. She showed up unexpectedly with the type of kindness that rocked the world. It didn’t matter if she just met you, you were a baby, an elder, or someone very different from her, she saw you. She forgave easily. She led graciously. She met you wherever you were. If she guessed you had a need, she would go out of her way to fill it…plus some. Her service could be quiet, she wasn’t trying to make a show. She was not intimidated by hard things, new things, or asking questions. She was not afraid to change her mind, open her heart, or look at what life was handing her and say, “Just one day.” She knew how to play: she’d get down on the floor, jump in the ocean, full-face laugh, break out in a British accent, pet the dogs, and could always be counted on to deliver snacks. She was here to spark change and help us grow.
She has left us a legacy of love.
Her young life was tricky and adventurous. Her mom, Linda, solo-parented most of her childhood. She told stories about catching worms in the middle of the night with her brothers and trapping a gopher in Tupperware to take home and show their mom while she showered (there was screaming). She would talk about visiting her uncle’s cabin, swimming in the canal next to snakes, stomping down sheep wool at her friend’s farm, her big love for her grandparents, and the delight at her sister’s birth when she was seventeen.
She married her sweetheart, Steve, at nineteen, and they built a beautiful life together in Montana. They had four children. She was known to say that it was her greatest joy to be a mother. Her favorite job. Her biggest achievement. She was good at surprises (like candy peas and carrots on April Fool’s Day…oh how she laughed), afterschool rice krispie treats, meeting every school teacher and making them salt dough name boards, volunteering, loving every one of her kids’ friends (even as adults), and giving her kids every experience possible. If her kids were doing a thing, she was right there supporting it. She elevated everything and every person she touched. As a family, they loved to camp at Seeley Lake, garden, take family bike rides, attend the rodeo, and doorbell-ditch Secret Santa gifts at Christmas. A favorite family memory was road-tripping to the Oregon Coast.
During this season of life, she could be found standing next to a lilac bush on a warm summer evening, hose in hand, watering the purple-blue flowers.
After her kids graduated from high school, she realized she had a whole other life to create. She served in home healthcare for 10 years, greatly impacting the lives of several lucky souls and their families. She was always a nurturer. Going to college to get her associate’s degree was a big highlight that filled her delight of learning. She was hired by Helena College after graduating, with her focus on helping every student and staff member feel important and included, looking for small ways to pay attention and make life easier, gave her a big purpose.
Her grandkids were some of her favorite people. She could not get enough of them and they loved her constant kisses and affection. She was an excellent baby-swaddler and toddler entertainer (perhaps her not-so-secret candy stash helped with this). If her grandkids had a thing they were into, she learned all about it so she could meet them there. She was an enthusiastic supporter of whatever brought their biggest joy. It was no secret that she adored taking them to the carousel and getting everyone ice cream. She has loved them each individually, always wanting them to feel like they belonged.
When she found out she had stage four lymphoma in 2020, in the middle of the tumult of that year, she did the hard thing and started chemo with Steve by her side. It was not kind. Her sweet dog Bella was her bestie and her family and work friends rallied to support and care for her body and spirit. Beating the cancer after two and a half years, the final stretch brought her a new softness. She let herself somehow love with a bigger combination of gentleness and fierceness. This final summer brought the graduation of her oldest grandchild, a trip to the ocean, a final camping trip, a Pink concert, and the birth of her sister’s daughter. She left this world in celebration.
She lived her life in widening circles.
She will be so missed.
She is survived by her husband, Steve; children and their spouses, Bonnie, Nathan and Sharlynn, Isaac and Alisa, and Anna; grandchildren Kimball, Axel, Hunter, Sawyer, Ruger, Colt, and Felicity; mother Linda; siblings and their spouses Todd and Dana, Mike, Kalina and BobbiJo; nieces and nephews Sarah, Sharlene, Caleb, Joshua, Eliza, Emma, Shivom, Finnegan, Elliot; mother-in-law Norma; and Patty and Tom. She is preceded by her granddaughter, Emma; nephew, Adam; father-in-law, Vic; and father, Steven.
Service Schedule
Family Receiving Friends
6:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m.
Wednesday October 2, 2024
Anderson Stevenson Wilke Funeral Home
3750 N. Montana Avenue
Helena, Montana
Family Receiving Friends
12:00 Noon to 1:00 p.m.
Thursday October 3, 2024
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
1260 Otter Road
Helena, Montana
Funeral Service
1:00 p.m.
Thursday October 3, 2024
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
1260 Otter Road
Helena, Montana
Interment
Immediately following the funeral service
Thursday October 3, 2024
Forestvale Cemetery
Helena, Montana
Service Schedule
Family Receiving Friends
6:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m.
Wednesday October 2, 2024
Anderson Stevenson Wilke Funeral Home
3750 N. Montana Avenue
Helena, Montana
Family Receiving Friends
12:00 Noon to 1:00 p.m.
Thursday October 3, 2024
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
1260 Otter Road
Helena, Montana
Funeral Service
1:00 p.m.
Thursday October 3, 2024
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
1260 Otter Road
Helena, Montana
Interment
Immediately following the funeral service
Thursday October 3, 2024
Forestvale Cemetery
Helena, Montana
Share
Amy K. says
Melanie was truly the heart of Helena College, and her loss is felt deeply by all of us. She was one of the kindest, most caring people I’ve ever known, with a genuinely beautiful soul. So many of us held her in deep love and respect. Every time I saw her, she was always helping someone – whether it was friends, colleagues, family, or even someone else’s family. Her generous nature and big heart were simply part of who she was.
I miss you so much, Melanie! There’s still so much I wanted to share with you. I keep thinking about how I saw you in the Student Center just a few days ago, and I wish I had stopped to chat instead of thinking we’d catch up later…
I can’t fully express the profound sadness I feel over this devastating news, but I find comfort in knowing that her spirit and kindness have left a lasting legacy for everyone who had the privilege of knowing her.
Shiv Parihar says
Your radiant love and acceptance meant more to me than I can ever say. There were a million more moments I wanted to share with my Aunt. I’ll miss you.
Nathan Heinitz says
XOXO
Jamie Tangen says
She gave the most wonderful hugs, the kind that held onto you for awhile. ❤️🌻🌹❤️
NAN LEFEBVRE says
I had the privilege of working with Melanie at Helena College. She was undoubtedly the sweetest person I have ever known. She was also the consummate professional and teammate. I am heartbroken by her untimely passing. Condolences to her family and friends, including the entire Helena College family.
Thank you, Melanie, for making life better for anyone you encountered. I wish you peace.
April Anthony says
Some of my memories of Melanie are that she always had a smile on her face and was such a positive and optimistic person. Always willing to help and plan an activity or craft.
Melanie brought joy and happiness to our family when she married my cousin Steve many years ago.
She had a beautiful accepting soul and will truly be greatly missed.
Many comforting hugs and prayers for your sweet beautiful family.
Loury Trader says
When I moved to Helena a few years ago, Melanie was the first one to welcome me and took me under her wing. Her light was always so bright and warm. She always loved talking about her family and grand babies. She love you all fiercely. Now, she’s on a new mission with the Savior as her mission companion and leader.
Love always my friend!
Will Tangen says
Melanie’s smile and laughter were contagious. She was such a loving and caring person, always concerned about others and she will be missed.
Coco P. says
Melanie was my mentor when I worked at Helena College. She welcomed me with unmatched kindness and warmth. She made me feel so welcome. Melanie was a light for so many, including me. I’m heartbroken to know she is gone.
Terri Atwood says
She and I discovered through genealogy that we were ninth cousins and we were excited to have that unique connection. I loved when she broke into her British accent, I loved her smile and I enjoyed her constant supply of goodies…..Helena College will not be the same without her, the world will not be the same without her. I am so profoundly sad that you won’t be at the Wilkes’ barbecue this summer cousin Melly. Love you.
Kim Scouten Birrenkott says
Melanie was a dear friend in High School and helped me through some rough times. Her home was my safe haven when my home was not. She was always so happy and kind. I remember going on her first date with Steve. It was to a drive in movie and she didn’t want to be alone because she didn’t know him well. A month later (or so it seems) she was engaged! I’m happy they found each other and made a wonderful life together. To my friend forever, safe journey.
Paulette Etchart says
Melanie was one of the most amazing people I’ve ever known. She worked as Caregiver for my sister, Nancy, prior to 2014. Nancy was in the last four years of her life and was very disabled from thirty plus years of brain cancer, and its treatments. In spite of so many daily challenges, Melanie treated Nancy and our family with so much respect, compassion and great care. She used her amazing organizational skills to bring order, fun, art, outings , books and interest to Nancy’s life. She also trained many others and was innovative, original, thoughtful and smart in her approach to our many challenges. She gave our sister, dignity and the best life possible in her final years. I will never forget Melanie and what a great friend she was to us and so many others! In the years since Nancy’s death Melanie remained a great friend! I will miss her!
Steve heinitz says
I will miss my dear wife’s love, laughter, and companionship. She did her utmost best to make every path she crossed feel special and loved. I am so proud of her accomplishments, she loved her family beyond measure. Thanks for everyone’s support, kind words
Michelle says
Melanie was a great person! She was always kind and friendly to me. I remember being at the college one day hanging out in my office when there wasn’t much going on or many students attending in-person classes anymore- this happened to be my bday and she brought me candy. It meant a lot to me. I hope she will have a good afterlife, whether she’s just chilling like the angel she is, performing admin work for the heavens, or continuing to provide guidance to her family members and those she meant the world to. May she rest in peace in however she deemed fit for when she’d join the other side.
Janis, Lynn, Brittanya &Theo Mabey says
Melanie was indeed a radiant light. She loved and played with young children and was loved by family and all those around her. Our hearts go out to Melanie’s family and we send our love and clouds of blessings to all the other special people in her life. She will be deeply missed by all.
Linda Meuret says
If you wanted a talented, caring, enthusiastic youth leader… Melanie was your gal. A creative and organized woman, Melanie would put her whole soul into whatever she was asked to do. It would be done neatly, and promptly and top notch. My husband and I lament her passing, as she was such a loving and caring person. She touched so many lives. We will all miss her.
God bless you and your dear family. We love you. 💕😍💜 Hugs 🫂
Cindy Chapman Williams says
Melanie was one of my dearest friends in high school and I am just so heartbroken that she is gone. Endlessly kind, loyal, funny, selfless and so many other wonderful qualities, Melanie made time for everyone and made everyone feel special. Her thoughtfulness and intentionality in making all she met feel loved and important has been a memory and inspiration to me in the many years since. To be there in the early days of her romance with Steve, and her complete joy in having met her soulmate, was another memory that I treasure. Her happiness in their partnership and family was unmatched. Sending constant prayers for her family and many friends – her light and love remain with you. I hope that brings some comfort in these very difficult times.
Jeannine and Manley Stallings says
Melanie was my councilor in the Relief Society for two years and she always gave all she had, no matter what responsibilities we had. She was always cheerful and good hearted and always made everyone feel so good. Whenever I would see her I got the best hugs and a fun visit whether at church, the store or the post office, wherever. I always got a sweet birthday card every year. When my daughter got married in Salt Lake, she and Bonnie flew down and did the table decorations for the luncheon following. She felt !like a member of my family, we shared so many fun times, challenging times, hours of phone conversations.
One night after a church meeting, we were all getting into our cars to go home and she yelled across the parking lot ‘Good bye my dear sisters! ‘ And so I say to you dear Melanie with a heavy heart, ‘Good bye my dear sister’. You will be missed by your family and co workers and friends and sisters but the Lord needed you there. Until we meet again.😥
So sorry to Steve and your whole family.
Benjamin Fowler says
Dear Heintiz Family,
So sorry to learn of Melanie’s passing. Every interaction I ever had with her was warm and positive. I pray for the Lord’s peace to be upon you during this difficult time.
Linda Huff says
Melanie was an integral part of our reunion. She was strong, caring. Raising great kids and supportive mother. She lived her faith and loved Steve. You will be missed. My prayers are with the family.
Beth Rolfe says
I first met Melanie when she was caring for my former roommate as an employee of Northwest Home Care.
Melanie was a fantastic caregiver and a wonderful person.
She brought her love and sparkle into every room she entered and she had a gift for making everyone feel like they were the only person in the room. She was a wonderful listener and a fabulous storyteller.
My heart breaks for her family. I will miss her kindness and her grace tremendously. Melanie was a blessing in my life and I’m most grateful our paths crossed
Mary P says
I will dearly miss Melanie. She was a bright light on campus every time you saw her. I loved many things about Melanie, but mostly loved hearing her wish for more love and peace everywhere. She so cared for so many and spread her generous and loving heart wherever she could. It was a privilege to know her and I am thankful for that. My husband Willard and I send our thoughts and prayers to Steve and all of Melanie’s family.
Kathi Cates says
I did not know Melanie, but I know she was a mother who loved her kids, and taught them all to be kind to others. I knew the kids and Alisa too. I was their Spanish teacher and I loved them all. They were always well-behaved and considerate to others. I’m so sorry for your loss. I always appreciate their hugs when I see them in public. What a lovely family.
Melissa Hanson says
I knew Melanie from way back, when I attended kindergarten with Bonnie, who was my best friend at 5 years old. Melanie was always actively involved in the East Helena PTA, and seeing her in the school hallways always made me so happy. I remember Melanie as someone with endless patience and compassion. She was one of the kindest humans I’ve ever had the pleasure to meet. She was loved and will be missed by more people than we can even fathom. My heart goes out to her family, she was a wonderful, dynamic presence and an absolute blessing.
Jelena Webb Kalderon says
In Hebrew language, we say בצלם אלקים, b’Tzelem Elokim.
It means that All People are Made in the Divine Image.
Each of us is unique, but we are not all righteous.
Melanie was righteous among us because she valued humanity in all people and life in all living creatures.
Her soul belongs to the World to Come.
May her merits follow her offspring, and may her memory be our eternal blessing!
Jackie Stoeckel says
As an adjunct faculty I depended on Melanie’s help in getting materials ready for my evening class. She was awesome and usually beat me to the punch having things ready way ahead of time. I looked forward to coming on campus weekly and seeing her bright and smiling face. She would leave these wonderful notes on my copies. Bright and cheery. Since I had retired I realized how much I missed that brief interaction. She will always be in my thoughts and prayers.
Ron Alsbury says
Tender thoughts for Melanie’s loved ones.
Who could forget her patented ‘’ Dying cockroach” celebrations at Cub Scout Blue and Gold Banquets!
Only to be surpassed by her epic object lessons in Senior Seminary. But most of all I will be eternally grateful for her unconditional connections with my two sons, meeting them where they were/are and loving them authentically!!! Rock on Melanie
Linda Campbell says
When people say it takes a village to raise a child, they are talking about Melanie. She has touched each of my children with her love and concern. One Thanksgiving my husband and I were called down to California because my mother was not expected to live much longer. We had to leave it 5 children home for a few days. Melanie came over and did the things only she would think of. She brushed and braided my youngest’s hair. She introduced them to egg nog and Sprite. She brought them little boys off love and joy at a sad time. It not only comforted them, but me as well knowing she was watching it for them. That’s what she did. She was a true shepherd to all. Thank you Melanie for your influence for good in each of us.
Kim Caldwell says
What a beautiful and apt tribute that is! It has been a blessing to know and love Melanie as a friend for many years and then as a coworker. She has been the heart of Helena College and her generosity, kindness, and fun spirit will be so missed. I have reflected on memories of Melanie these last several days and I want to be more like her. If we could all be a little more like Melanie, the world would be a better place! Sending many prayers and wishes for peace to her family at such a hard time.
Theresa Stahly says
My heart goes out to the Heintiz Family. Melanie was a very dedicated caregiver to my mother. She was kind, caring, compassionate and patient. Those traits never faltered even during the most difficult of days. While no longer employed as a caregiver, she still came to my mother’s side in her time of need, and she supported us as a family after Mom’s passing. Melanie stayed behind at the cemetery while we went to the funeral reception, to be sure mom was “tucked in” appropriately. I will never forget that. I know how proud she was of her family and how much she loved you. The world has lost a beautiful soul. I am blessed and grateful that she was a part of our life. Your family is in our thoughts and prayers.
Laurie Ditto says
I’m so sorry to hear of your beloved Melanie’s passing. She was always SO kind and thoughtfull, with every interaction we had. Her smile and big heart had a way of touching my heart. She had such a positive effect on people, and her personality shined from within, to the extent you couldn’t help exchanging smiles with her. I know she will continue to shine 💟
May our dear Lord’s comfort and blessings be with each member of her sweet family, and sending sincerest sympathy in your time of grief and loss. 💜
Shelli Schuett says
Steve & Family- I never got to meet Melanie, but she sounded like an amazing person. She would have to be to put up with Steve all these years. My heart goes out to you at this unexpected passing. “When you love someone, you can still hear their laughter after they are gone”. May your hearts be filled with the sounds of her laughter in these next difficult times.
Kara Twitchell Steger says
One summer, when I was turning 12 years old, I spent most of it at the Heinitz’s. One day, Melanie had Anna and me help polish the silverware. She told us how she used to do this as a little girl. Each piece was cared for. She had me work on the teaspoons. It was so rewarding to see it shine. I feel like Melanie knew how to polish people. I hope I can be more like her, and be brave enough to love like she does!
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Kate Runnalls says
Melanie was a gift to everyone she met. I had the pleasure of teaching her children in East Helena. I believe I was one who receive a name plate above my door that Melanie had made. She had the biggest heart ever and was willing to help in any situation. She was one of the most supportive parents I had in my career. She was the kind of person that once you met her she was an instant friend. She will be greatly missed.
Julie (Beaver) Ladd says
Steve and family,
I am so saddened to hear of your great loss. Although I never met your Melanie, I am most certain that her influence on each of you is what makes you all such wonderful and caring people. You are all in my prayers. Blessings and peace,
Julie (Beaver) Ladd
Kevin Williams says
Steve and Family,
I just heard this news, and I am at a loss for words. She was dedicated and caring to all around her. I remember her as a great Primary music leader. Melanie brought such excitement and enthusiasm to the kids – I loved both her and their excitement. I remember singing time and her throwing handfuls of Hi-Chews into the crowd of kids and them jumping around like they were at a rock concert! I was awesome and we all loved it. Kevin Williams