Nicole Ann Gray (age 49) passed away from a cardiac arrest on July 25, 2012 in Helena, MT. Nicole was born January 8, 1963, the first daughter of Susan and Harold Gray.
Nicole is survived by her 13 year-old twins, Nicholas and Clara who will miss her dearly. She is preceded in death by her father Harold Gray (Long Standing Bear Chief, Browning, MT), deceased September 25, 2010. She is survived by her mother Susan Gray (nee Brown) of Helena, MT and her siblings Joe Gray (Denise), Elizabeth Pepion (Mike), Margaret Boyer (Bob), Alex Gray, and Celina Gray. Nieces and nephews Jordan, Andrew, Jackson, Alice, Isidor, William, Sam, and Michael will all greatly miss their auntie’s kisses and pinches. She is also survived by paternal Uncle Gerald Gray Sr. (Joanne) and Auntie Marilyn Gray and families and maternal uncles Bill (Jan) and Doug (Lily) and families, as well as many other cousins. She is preceded in death by paternal Aunt Doreen Gray Huffer (Tom) and Darryl Gray (JoAnn). Her grandparents were Al and Margaret (Reynolds) Brown of Helena, and Ernest and Josie (McKay) Gray of Browning.
Nicole has both Irish and Native American heritage. She was an enrolled member of the Montana Little Shell Tribe of Chippewa Indians and a direct descendant of the Blackfeet and Cree Tribes. She is descended from Blackfeet Chief Lone Walker, Sinopah and Rising Wolf (Hugh Monroe) and the Métis of Canada.
On her maternal grandparents’ side she was descended from some of the first settlers in the Territory of Montana, who came up the Missouri River on a paddlewheel steamer from St. Louis, Missouri to Fort Benton, Montana Territory. Nicole’s great-great grandparents emigrated from Ireland via Ontario, Canada to Great Falls and started one of the first meatpacking plants. Her great-great grandmother, Winifred Downing, was one of the first white babies documented to be born in Fort Benton, Montana Territory.
Nicole was born and educated in Missoula, Montana. Nicole’s parents raised her and her brothers, and sisters with a firm grounding in traditional beliefs. She was raised attending traditional Native ceremonies. In high school, she joined the Indian Student Club. Nicole gave presentations on Native issues since she was in grade school. She started speaking in public when she was 12 years old. She has spoken on panels regarding racism as experienced by Native people as well as other issues. She was a storyteller of traditional Blackfeet and Cree stories. Her children have helped her demonstrate traditional social dances for both Plains Indians and Inupiat Eskimos.
She worked for ten years in the Arctic Inupiat Eskimo village of Barrow, Alaska at the Arctic Women-In-Crisis shelter program. She returned to Montana to work as the public outreach coordinator for the Montana Coalition Against Domestic and Sexual Violence in Helena. Nicole had recently started working for the Little Shell Tribe as their Tobacco Prevention Specialist. Nicole completed projects for and maintained memberships in groups such as Women of Color, Sisters of Color Ending Sexual Abuse and the National Coalition Against Sexual Assault. She was a member on Montana’s Cherish Our Indian Children Task Force, a board member of the Missoula Indian Center and part of the Speaker’s Bureau for the Missoula School District. Nicole participated in panel discussions on racism and was a classroom speaker on Native American cultures.
Nicole was an avid reader and enjoyed genealogy, cross-stitch and travel. She was a huge sports fan and loved basketball, football (Green Bay Packers) and tennis.
A wake will be held at 320 Power Street, Helena, Montana starting Sunday afternoon. Funeral Services are scheduled at10:30 a.m., Tuesday, July 31, 2012 at Retz Funeral Home Chapel, 315 East 6th Avenue, Helena. Montana. Burial will follow at Forestvale Cemetery, 490 Forestvale Road. Tuesday afternoon reception will follow at 320 Power Street. In lieu of flowers, donations can be made to the Helena Indian Alliance, 435 N. Last Chance Gulch, Helena, MT 59601. To offer a condolence or share a memory of Nicole, please visit: www.retzfuneralhome.com.
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Rose Pulliam says
Condolences
Luz Marquez says
Dear Gray Family,
Like many others- I too thank you for sharing Nicole with many of us. She was a great advocate and trully believed in building bridges across Communities of Color.
I will keep you all in my prayers and only hope that time will allow you all to grieve and love each other through this.
Siempre Pa’lante Luz
Anne Bartsch says
Dear Nicky and Clara,
I was so sorry to hear about your mom. I haven’t seen any of you in a long time but I know your mom loved you both so much. She was an amazing woman. She will live on in both of you. You are blessed to have each other.
Love, Mrs. Bartsch
(first grade)
Peg Hunter says
Clara and Nicholas,
Be gentle with yourselves, and hold on to each other and the wonderful memories you have of your mom.
I am thinking about you every moment.
Peg Hunter
Brittani Cato says
Clara and Nicky, I will miss mama gray lots and I am so sorry for your loss. I wish I was with you to ffer my support. Brittani
Dave Hyem says
I was a childhood friend on Nicole and Joe when I lived on Van Buren Street in Missoula. I’m very sorry to hear this news and wish everyone in Nicole’s family peace and comfort during this difficult time.
Laurie Kops says
Dear Nicky’s family…..there aren’t enough wonderful things to say about Nicky. Her passion for her family, especially her children, her understanding of the needs of others, her hilarious sense of humor, and the joy and love she brought to all will live on in the hearts she touched. The world has lost a bright and shining star….the Creator has gained one back. Much love and sympathy to all of you.
Tina L Speed says
I worked with Nikki through the MCADSV as I am a member and a Board member as well. She was a cherished staff person and friend and will be sadly missed. My condolences to her children and other family members. We shared many stories about our children over the years that I knew her.
Melveena Malatare says
On behalf of the Blackfeet DV Program, the staff sends out heartfelt condolences to Nicole’s family and especially her children. The Blackfeet DV Program had the opportunity to know and work with Nicole for years and also appreciated her presence at various workshops and conferences in the area of domestic violence. Nicole will be deeply missed. Again, the Blackfeet DV Program sends prayers and thoughts for the family and children of Nicole.
Rebecca Balog says
Sister, you are cherished. I will continue to do the work in your honor and will miss your gentle approaches to how we did our work. You were my partner at WOCN and I am so happy we had a chance to do presentations together and speak to non-natives on how to be a good ally.
I am always with you as you will always be with us.
Pilamaye mi Kola, me cuwe.
Rebecca
Erik Brown says
Cousin Nicky, I will forever miss your wonderful smile, calm demeanor, soothing voice and gentle way. I will keep forever the wonderful memories of holidays and time spent at the cabin. Nicholas and Clara, you have a wonderful extended family and we are all there for you if and when you need us. With much sorrow and love,
Erik
Sumayya Fire says
I will miss Nicole. I was so looking forward to doing some groundbreaking national advocacy work with her, learning from and sharing with her closely on many things.
I remember giving her a huge promised hug upon her arrival at the MN Call to Action Conference in July after long travels. She was so glad to be with us and I wanted her to feel greatly welcome, appreciated, valued, loved. She was a member of the Institute planning team and helped keep us on track. Every time she spoke in other areas as a consultant, she shared deep knowledge that made we want to know more of what she knew. Her childlike way of honoring others was admirable too. I will remember her quiet strength and peacable manner, her watchful eyes, impeccable words and gentleness. I will remember her and I will miss her dearly.
May her family be loved by our love for Nicole. Thanks for sharing her with us. Peace and love to Nicole and her family.
Rachel Allen says
I am so sorry to hear that Nicole has passed away. I learned so much from Nicole while working with her at the Montana Coalition Against Domestic and Sexual Violence. I will always remember her wisdom and warm heart.
Carole Spahr says
Susan and family–from my family to yours. Please accept our condolences on the loss of Nicole. She was an outstanding young woman. You are in our thoughts and prayers.
Carole Spahr, Lisa Myklebust (Whitehouse), Wendy Myklebust , and Billie Spahr.
Julia R Vincent says
I am stunned and saddened to learn of Nikki’s passing. My heart is with her children and her family. May her Spirit have a good journey.
Kathy Marks says
I am so very sorry to hear of Nicky’s death. What a loss for her family, friends, and the community.
Ginny Cass says
Nicky was always optimistic and good natured, friendly and compassionate. I’ll miss her!
While I lost track of her after she moved back to Montana, I thought of her often. I know the life she lived was full of caring and love for children and good causes.
To the members of her family,and those that I know, Margaret and Bob, Elizabeth, Marilyn, and of course Susan, Nicholas and Clara, remember Nicky without pain, she was called early because she was a special person.
Dianna Reber Riley says
Susan, What wonderful tributes to your daughter. I remember when you were married and began your family all those years ago. You must have been so proud of her and her accomplishments. I am very sorry for your loss. Sincerely, Dianna Reber Riley
MC (Crump) Jenni says
I just looked up Joey Gray online and discovered this news about Nicky. I started at Prescott School in 5th grade and Joey was in my class. Nicky was a grade above us. He actually is the one who named me “MC” and I have been that ever since. I remember Nicky clearly walking to and from school. She always had an aura of patience, love and care. She always reflected a loving and spiritual strength. Now, I am working in the social issues that she devoted herself to. I will hold her lovingly in my heart as I proceed in this work. I send her whole family and all her ancestors who came before her mountains of honor, respect and love. MC Jenni (formerly Mary Catherine Crump)
Clara A Gray says
It has been 8 years since we lost an amazing, outgoing and strong woman. To this day, I catch myself thinking of her. Her beauty, passion, love, much effort to do what she can for herself and others. For some reason, it feels just as painful now, than it was the day we found out. I cannot explain the emotions I feel upon grief.. But I can say this, you were the one who took us in. Took the up most care for us. You brought us down here, to meet your own, and begin a new life. Making sure we were okay, no matter what. I look up to you, Mom. Your strength, passion for work and helping others as well. How you just kept fighting. I love you, Nicole Ann Gray (Bird Sings Different) never ending.