Will Carrell, age 20, died tragically and unexpectedly on January 1, 2023 while returning to Advanced Individual Training (AIT) for the Army at Fort Eustis, VA with the 128th Aviation Brigade.
Will was born on July 21, 2002, and was the second-oldest of 11 Carrell children, and was baptized at the Cathedral of Helena in 2006. As a child, bedtime was his least-favorite part of the day; he would wait for his parents to sleep, then turn on the lights and play all night. His parents would find him in the morning sticking out of the closet, asleep on a pile of toys. He lived a bit like that and was perhaps not made for this world—or at least the adult version of it. Though school came easy for him (he was voted most likely to be president at St. Andrews), he left early to join the workforce. And though he worked hard and took pride in it, he struggled to find a career that could hold his attention, or compete with his many passions until he joined the military.
He read a lot, especially philosophy, and didn’t think it was fair that you were born into the social contract; you should have the option to just go into the mountains and become a mountain man. He dreamed of going into the wild, with “no one to tell you what to do.” He loved spending time outdoors, such as one recent bushcraft adventure with his dad and brother Joe, he brought only a military surplus poncho he found somewhere, and slept under it, buried in snow, while his dad and Joe slept under tarp shelters. “This is fine,” he said. “I’m plenty warm in here, probably warmer than you.”
If something caught his interest, he didn’t wait for a second opinion; he just did it. He loved board games, music, kittens, fine dining (with bedhead and scraggly whiskers), the Chicago Bears and shooting guns. Two years ago he got into chess, and ended with a competitive rating of 1371. He mastered solving a Rubik’s Cube in under a minute, and would often recite factoids to his family, pacing back and forth: “so, apparently a snake swallowed a cooler.” He loved being with family, including his younger siblings, who he loved deeply. He took them to Top Gun the summer before he left for Basic.
He loved walking—as a child, in the cemetery behind their house, and later in life he would spend many nights walking or riding his bike around Helena, coming back full of facts about the downtown area, or a helpful tip: “so dad, you know that pawn shop? Don’t go walk around the back at 3am.” He loved Helena, and missed it deeply when he left for Basic and his dad would send him a video of the snow. “I can’t wait to see Helena again.”
He had a few close friends, his brother Joe, and Jack and Rudy, two friends who were like brothers to Joe and Will. The smallest of the group, he was always challenging them to box him, and “totally destroyed” Rudy’s knee that way.
He had a deep sense of responsibility, was quite serious about lawn work, always cleaning out the gutters, making grocery runs, or taking 6 kids to the dentist while being mistaken for their dad—all without complaining. When he was 15 or 16, he bought an American flag with his own money and installed it on the house. For a long time, he would take it down each night but after careful consideration and much debating with himself he decided the porch light was sufficient light. He eventually took it down because it wasn’t presentable anymore.
He didn’t bother much with the small things, like picking up or grooming. He had bigger, more important and more interesting things to do and think about: strategizing about chess, planning his next adventure in the woods, or thinking about the throwing knives or axes he recently bought. Sleeping outside in 45 degrees in the rain during an exercise in Basic Training, he judged it to be more of a hassle to take his rain gear out of his pack than to sleep in the rain. He wrote in a letter home, “something clicked for me in my brain that night, laying on the forest floor soaking wet with my weapon in my hands, that I’ve made the right choice. At that moment, I went from surviving BCT (Basic Combat Training) to thriving here.”
He was tough, partly in the devil-may-care way; the little boy sleeping on a pile of toys became the young military recruit sleeping in the rain because he couldn’t be bothered to take out his rain gear. He broke his wrist in practice playing small fry football, only learning it was broken two days later when he couldn’t hold his pencil at school. He asked the doctor for a cast that would allow him to play the next day, and did. Or the time (before he was preparing for the military) he ran 6 miles in 98 degree weather with weights in a backpack in his cowboy boots that were 2-sizes-too-big, just because. On one bushcraft adventure with dad and Joe, he slipped and cut his finger, emerging with a rifle slung around him, holding an ax in one hand, dripping blood from the other. He hiked out, got stitches, and went back out the same day, refusing painkillers because he never, ever, wanted to not be clear-headed.
Part of his toughness came from something else. Like the time in Basic Training when he had a bad toothache that he didn’t tell anyone about, until it became unbearable after he hit his rifle against it during training, and found out he needed a root canal. He got the root canal and went straight to the range for Rifle Qualification. “As tough as he was, he had the softest heart of all of us,” said his mother Beth, “so soft that he wouldn’t share his suffering.” His family missed him dearly when he went to Basic, and in a letter-never-sent during his first week there, he wrote “please don’t mourn my absence because I can’t bear the thought of mom crying because of what I have done. I will see all of you soon.” He left for his military training with an empty backpack, a few $100 bills, some military meal vouchers, and his orders. He judged it too big a hassle to use the vouchers or break the large bills, so he didn’t eat along the way. He also lost the backpack on the plane, and when he showed up with nothing, the drill sergeant yelled at him, “Recruit! Are you homeless?” Perhaps he was, in the way of never quite finding a home in the social contract of the adult world.
Yet in the military it seemed he had perhaps found it. He said it was his “last option,” and he was on track to be stationed in Alaska as a Chinook mechanic. He loved the obstacles in the military, and the hard things like the gas chamber. He said they were all easy. But he hated “getting smoked” all day by drill sergeants.
He followed all the rules, except his one piece of contraband—a paper chess board he made along with the pieces, which he was so proud of being undefeated on. All he was allowed to read was the Bible, and he read the entire New Testament. He had always loved the Hail Holy Queen prayer, and was fascinated by the Holy Trinity, often picking out three of something, like skittles, and giving a brief explanation “made of the same stuff, but different.” He struggled in his faith, but clung to it—always searching for deeper answers, always questioning, but never really doubting. During Basic he really dove into and drew strength from his faith and the scriptures, and he also began praying the Rosary and Divine Mercy Chaplet.
After spending his last Christmas at home, he left to report back for his AIT. He was apprehensive, missing the Helena that he loved, his family, friends, and childhood; but he was excited, on the precipice of a promising new vocation that he had dreamed of. He had stayed up all night on a red eye flight the night before, and there had been some confusion about the date of his reporting. The family does not and may never know why or how, but somewhere in this story of what happened and who Will was, circumstances combined to produce a tragically impulsive moment where he chose to cut his promising young life short.
The Catholic Church teaches that “we should not despair of the eternal salvation of persons who have taken their own lives (Catechism 2283),” and we are hopefully expectant that we will yet see the face of our sweet boy, made more perfect than he already was by the grace and mercy of our Lord.
He is survived by his parents Beth and Nick Carrell, grandparents Dan and Cherie Wing, Patricia Carrell (and Joe Colella) Gary Carrell (and Umran Ozer), and siblings Joseph (fiancé Laura LeMieux) Mia, Rylan, Elaina, Juliet, Emma, Samantha, Benjamin, Annie and Marianna.
A Funeral Mass will be held at the Cathedral of St. Helena at 12:00pm on Tuesday January 17, followed by the Committal Service at Resurrection Cemetery where he will receive full military honors. Please join the family for a Reception across the street at Anderson Stevenson Wilke Funeral Home following the burial.
Service Schedule
Funeral Mass
Noon to 1:00 PM
Tuesday January 17, 2023
Cathedral of St. Helena
530 N Ewing St
Helena, Montana 59601
Burial with Military Honors
Following the Funeral Mass
Tuesday January 17, 2023
Resurrection Cemetery
3685 N Montana Ave
Helena, Montana 59602
Reception
Following the Burial Service
Tuesday January 17, 2023
Anderson Stevenson Wilke Social Hall
3750 N Montana Ave
Helena, Montana 59602
Service Schedule
Funeral Mass
Noon to 1:00 PM
Tuesday January 17, 2023
Cathedral of St. Helena
530 N Ewing St
Helena, Montana 59601
Burial with Military Honors
Following the Funeral Mass
Tuesday January 17, 2023
Resurrection Cemetery
3685 N Montana Ave
Helena, Montana 59602
Reception
Following the Burial Service
Tuesday January 17, 2023
Anderson Stevenson Wilke Social Hall
3750 N Montana Ave
Helena, Montana 59602
Sandy Eckhart says
This is the most beautiful obituary I have ever read. Thank you for sharing your son’s story with all of us so we can begin to know him as your family has. My deepest condolences.
Dorothy Millsop says
I don’t know you – you don’t know me but I couldn’t resist reading your son’s obituary. Thank you for writing a beautiful – entertaining obituary. Makes me wish I knew him! God be with you in your time of sorrow. Prayers for your family.
Linda Vaughey says
Thanks to Sandy Eckhart for expressing what I too felt ~ Will’s obituary was indeed the most beautiful I have ever read. May your memories be of great comfort; and may your faith in our Lord and Savior sustain you. Blessings to you and all who loved Will.
Carol Henderson says
Your memorial was the most eloquent, beautiful and heartfelt one I have ever read. I am a mother and a grandmother and every line tore at my heart but also sent another prayer to God for your son, Will – and your beautiful family. I believe in the same God you do and I know without a doubt that Will is now wearing a second set of “wings”. May God bless you and your family.
Jennifer Rockman says
My thoughts and prayers are with you all. This is beautifully written and makes us feel like we know your precious son Will.
May the memories find you comfort, and your faith get you through this devastating time.
Jenn Balsley Rockman (Lauren and Heidi’s aunt)
Sara Boutilier says
I remember your sweet boy from his early elementary school years. He was a kind friend to my son. I’m so very sorry for your loss and have you all in my thoughts and prayers.
Debbie Hurni says
This is truly the most beautiful story of a young man’s life I have ever read. I read it & I read it again to my husband with tears in my eyes & love in my heart for Will & his family. Will was an extraordinary person & what a blessing to all that knew him. I know his grandparents Cherie & Dan.
We are praying for God to wrap his arms around all of you as you grieve & help heal your broken hearts. 🙏 You will see him again I don’t doubt it for a minute.
Brittany Hogan says
My sincerest and heartfelt condolences to the entire Carrell family and all who knew Will. Prayers to all of you.
God Bless, Brittany Hogan
Donna and Bill Eckerson says
Our hearts go out to you Dan and Cherie, Beth and Nick and children and Wing and Carrell families. We wish you lots of love at this difficult time. May you find peace and comfort in all your wonderful memories with Will. The obituary was amazing. Love you all, Donna and Bill Eckerson
Kristy Boese says
I was deeply moved by your son’s obituary. He was obviously a special person. I don’t know your family but I know the loss of a son. You are all in my prayers. I wish you peace.
Aimee Muffick says
Carrell and Wing families,
I am so sorry for your loss. I know your faith and love will guide you through this difficult time. Will was a special kid and your words about him are beautiful. May God bless you all and keep your hearts in His hands.
Ashton Burns says
Will was a great friend of mine, I met him through basic only a couple of months ago. Although I knew him for such a short time, no moment with him felt boring or dispiriting. We were pairs during multiple field training exercises. During rucks the pain was pretty unbearable and although we had no medical remedy available the pain would soon subside, as he would talk about the stars and point out different constellations in the sky, I ended up forgetting about the aches and blisters. Playing tic tac toe and I spy with my little eye for hours while pulling security. He helped the time pass so fast, we could talk for hours about anything. Its heart wrenching he had to leave so soon. My heart aches for you and your family, rest in peace.
Beth says
Thank you so much for your consolations. Soldier Burns, we appreciate you sharing your story more than you can know. We miss him so much. Thank you to everyone.
Jan Gibson says
Just adding my thoughts and a prayer for your young Will. Quite the man and one I won’t forget. I didn’t know him, but I sure do now and consider him quite remarkable. I’m so glad to have “known him.” Godspeed to you, Will.
Sandra says
I am so grateful you are sharing Will’s life with us. Sometimes all we get from a notice is the resume of a person’s life, and they are so much more than that amd so are their families. God is good, and our family is praying for the repose of Will’s soul, and the healing of your entire family. We will be attending. Our love as parents goes out to you both and if you need anything at all, I hope you will ask. God be with you.
Sean McCleary says
In quite moments, in the Mountains of Montana, I will whisper his name.
Claire Bryce says
These thoughts and prayers are so precious. As Will’s aunt it is moving to see the large community around our family—all the love, meals, prayers, and willingness to be present and available are so appreciated.
Kathleen Hamill says
Our hearts are breaking for the Carrell and Wing families. We are keeping you all in our prayers. I pray your memories and knowing so many care will comfort you in these dark days. Our sincerest sympathy.
Kathy & Maury Hamill
Linda Graham says
Beth, I remember Brian playing with Will when he was young, enjoying his imagination and his spirit. Brian enjoyed his time with him and would have been proud of him as a young man. Our deepest sympathy.
Katie (Roberts) Church says
So incredibly sorry for your loss. Sounds like he was a really wonderful person. You have been in our thoughts and prayers since we heard. -Katie, Charlie and Teddy
Linda Mosness says
I did not know your son, but after reading his obituary, I felt that it would have been a delight to have known him. There were some similarities to a young man who is very near & dear to my heart, so I really felt a connection to your young man. I read other comments which people had posted, & the reason I wanted to write was much the same as so many commented: the obituary held such warm, loving, and deeply felt words from your heart that it obviously touched many hearts, as well. It was such a beautiful and insightful description of your son. Thank you & bless you for sharing your heart with us. I am deeply sorry for your loss.
Ted Polette says
My heart goes out to you and your family. I CAN imagine what you are going through because my precious daughter, Jackie, took her life too back on Feb. 8, 2021. There are so many questions that will never be answered and that’s one of the toughest things. Jackie was an outdoors person who cherished family and the wilderness just like Will. I’m so sorry for your loss. The “fog” that you are experiencing right now will thin and your memory, which right now is probably taxed, will mostly return after the numbness subsides. Your wonderful memories, which I’m sure after reading your wonderful story of Will’s life, are many , will eventually bring smiles more times than not instead of tears like they do now. Your journey through the wilderness of grief will be a challenge, as it is for all of us suicide survivors, so be gentle with yourself and accept help from those who offer it. Do what YOU feel like doing right now and don’t worry about accommodating everyone else’s desires. A lot of people mean well, but just don’t know what to say. When they are at a loss for words I just say, “There are really no words”, and leave it at that. Unfortunately, there are too many of us survivors out there, but we are all going through the same thing and have an instant bond with each other. We have a suicide survivors group called BREATHE that is so supportive and we meet the 4th Tuesday of every month at St. Peter’s Hospital. We would love to have you join us WHEN YOU are ready.
I’m sure Jackie met Will at THE gates and is showing him around right now. 🙂 Listen to the song “Show Me Around” by Carly Pearce, I think you will love it like I do! I hope we get to meet some day. Call me at 406-459-0055 if I can help you in any way! Sincerely, Ted